bucket list

My bucket list

1)Spend a month in a small village in Russia

2)Teach a 500 people yes!+ course

3)Shout at the top of my voice,like tarzan in a crowded shopping mall

4)Walk up to a random girl and say

"Aye! Aathi kya khandala"

5)Spend one whole day with Guruji

6)Get a six pack (Sigh!what a distant dream)

7)Write a fantastic, refined novel

8)Visit Bodh gaya

9)Own a freckin canon 5d mark II with a manfrotto video tripod and the best video mic

11)Own all the dslr rigs including a dolly!

10)Take a sabbatical for 1 year and just drift between Greece.China.Russia.Sweden.India.Alaska.

without carrying my cell phone.

11)do 4 back to back advance courses.

12)Have huge library of my own with thousands of books.

13)live atleast 30 percent of what is taught in Astha vakra geeta

14)Have a hitech room filled with books and all apple gadgets!

15)Drive to the middle of nowhere and spend 2 days locked a car.

16)Read entire mirza ghalib's poetry.

Okay...i know the followers of my blog(imaginary),will not read the entire post if it is too long...so i will keep it simple....

somethings i have learnt recently:

1)the proper explanation for fake it you make it(given by guruji during one of the satsangs)

it was damn brilliant..."exploded" my mind off...

2)grace will flow, when you take up something, which you think is way beyond your capacity.

3)when in silence,with head bend down, while walking,eating, etc, it is possible to not look at anyone's face, girls esp, no matter how pretty you think she might by looking at her toes.

4)its not about the organization. Its about the people in it.

5)sexy bhav ko saskhi bahv sey dekho -- jiggy bhai!

6)i can never get bored of doing advance courses and being in silence(just completed my 7th)

7) Except for moments of immense clarity, which dawns from depths of silence, I generally,fail to see things for what they are...to just observe the "issness" of things as is said echkart(notice that his name rhymes with itch guard) in his book " power of now"

and if i only fail to see things as they are...it is obvious that you too would also be utterly hopeless at this ;)

8)drop all concepts,all identifications, in fact even the burden of words of knowledge..the only truth is the the guru's silence.Soak it in and chill.Become innocent.If you are not,then fake it till you make it.

9)If you think AOL, is an profit making or money making organization or whatever, then you are suffering from a rare condition called "premature intellectual ejacul...tion".Get well soon.

10)sometimes it is good to football of someone else'e opinion.Just make sure it is the right person.

ps: if you exist, comment!

My first quatrain

The first love will never die
in the silent symphony of life it will always lie
empty promises, unspoken words,clasped hands and smiles so sly.
will nudge the heart to the pang of days gone by.

quatrain by vikram seth

I will be easy company;the blur
Of what i had longed for will fade to space.
No thought that could discomfort you will stir.
My eyes will painlessly survey your face.

hope with reason now laced

attempts to assuage

raw wounds of love,

simple and unfilled

have failed;

i wonder

now and then,how would it be

if,only if!it was you and me.

The few times we met,

i can never forget,

i wish i had never met you,

god and his cruel games!

of love or fondness for you,

i have no claims.

what are you to me?

a friend?

an acquaintance perhaps?

i wish i knew,

these nebulous feelings i have for you!

memories,images from the fleeting moments of togetherness

are now etched forever in me

-your gentle smile,your innocent eyes,your voice-

ah!bliss!

lets meet once,

or twice if you agree!

just the two of us,

that will be enough before you go your way,i promise!

i will notice all the nuances-

the colour of your eyes,the shape of your eyebrows,

the shade of your lips,the tone of your laughter-

It will give me

memories,enough to meander through my life.

what about me you ask?

what will i do ?

well,let me see.

you have asked a tough question,

i should thank god,perhaps.

for the gift of memory,

memory!,

that wonderful talisman,

which binds you to me

god is not so cruel afterall,

my apologies.

fine i broke my specs!

but this time too i did it in style,i sat on them and heard the bitter cry of the delicate frame that held the other pair of my eyes.

"u moron",it shrieked.

I simply got up, looked down and smiled at it .

"Accept people and situations as they are" ,i told and being the satvic spectacles that it is ,it acquiesced.

"Get yourself a new pair quickly ,you semi-blind fellow.Remember i was your spare one! ",it said ,but this time there was a tinge of love.

"Yes!",i said

I was almost a little maudlin at the unexpected loss,because it had served me well,for 7 whole months,before it's soul got squashed under my weight (not that i weigh much).

Also it's departure was the least dramatic when compared to the way i lost all other specs .

Here i should mention that i added an extra pair of eyes in my 6th class,as a consequence of addiction of the need for speed game .Consider for instance, the way i lost my specs in my first year in bits.I was sitting on the bike(driven by senior) ,coming back to the campus ,after doing some work for a dept in panjim.The senior was driving at close to 85 k mph."This is awesome man,so cool",i shouted,feeling like one of the those characters in dhoom(whats the harm in imagining!).

In an act of extreme foolishness i slightly turned my head back ,god knows why.The next thing i knew was that my specs went flying into the air and fell on the road,now a bike at 85 kmph needs time to decelerate and come to an halt.So after walking for five minutes ,i saw my specs.

But alas!as i was crossing the road to get my specs,a speeding tata sumo ran over it,crushing it into pieces.I saw it!That grotesque sight of shattered glass,a slight tint of red (imagined) symbolic of its demise,accentuated by the ugly goan sun.

I thought of running behind the sumo like the hero's we see in movies,but the agony was too much!

anyway ,coming back to the specs i sat on.So,i lost my specs and did not have the time to go to vasco and get a new specs.Also i was wary of getting my specs from a lousy place like goa.From Bangalore i thought.I will get it done in Bangalore.

But in the intermittent period my life was blurred!

I become a vision-erry.

here is how:

i was walking with friend of mine and said

"my god!who is this guy,he is all tall as a tree"

my friend was non-plussed.

"kahan bey?",he said

"abey ,aggey dekh,itna lamba tho hai ",i qupped and pointed my finger at the "outline"

my friend burst out laughing .

It turned out to be tall tree,not a tree-tall person.

Or consider this:

during the pooja for navratri in the aol ashram ,i sat far behind the place where the pooja was taking place .But i made an attempt ,whenever i was not asleep,to see what was happening from the screens put up.

So,i saw, what i thought, was a couple getting married and the girl taking guruji's blessings and i said to an lady sitting next to me

"what a lucky girl!"

The lady gives a puzzled look.

I return the look back.

And i realize nothing as such happened there.

Accept people and situations as they are!